Parents antiguide: how to annoy your teenage daugther

Hey, hey! It’s snowing outside but just because I can’t find my skiing stuff and it’s damn cold outside, I’m drinking ginger & lemon tea and writing next post on this blog. I had no comments on last post so… no novels or anything because you aren’t interested.

Before I start writing “Parents antiguide: how to annoy your teenage daugther”, I must say that you better not use this in real life. At least few of these are actually bitchy, in my opinion. When you were warned, now we can dive in this list! P.S. Many of these were taken from my own life.

  • It doesn’t matter if it’s her fault or not when you got annoyed, DO NOT let her go to Ed Sheeran’s concert. And it doesn’t matter that she cleaned her room perfectly every week and woke up earlier in the morning just to make you a cup of tea.
  • Go shopping with her and say that she can pick whatever she likes. THEN buy clothes for her that you like but she doesn’t.
  • Get mad when she asks you to make a cup of tea for her. It doesn’t matter that she made that damn tea for you everytime you asked and said nothing.
  • Say that you will throw out all her nail polishes next time when she will get you mad, EVEN IF that happens accidentaly.
  • Say that her ideas are useless and she should stop realising them.
  • Don’t let her sleep until 10 a.m. or more when it’s school break or weekends. IT DOESN’T matter that she already done all her homework yesterday.
  • Say that all her taste of music is shit. Then turn on the music from 80’s that she hates the most and say that it’s brilliant.
  • Comment ten times a minute,when she’s watching her favourite movie. If possible, comments should be negative.
  • Don’t forget to say that she dresses up for school like a prostitute.
  • Yell and get mad everytime she gets a bad grade. You’re daughter IS NOT ALLOWED to not be perfect.
  • Rarely let her go to parties or out with her friends. Better say that she needs to feed the dogs, wash dishes and laundry, buy food for some food she never cooked, cook it and more stuff you can think of. EVEN BETTER – sit and watch TV whole time she’s doing that.
  • Ask, why she never wants to spend time with you. When she says that it’s because you’re too judgemental, reply: “Oooh, so it’s always my fault! Don’t you dare to blame it on me!”
  • When she’s finally telling the truth, judge her as much as you can.

Okay, I’m too lazy to continue. 😀 This was just a small look into this “Parents antiguide” but I hope that’s enough. 🙂

xoxo, Porcelain Doll.

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